School & pressure
"I'm cooked" is how a lot of teenagers admit they're struggling.
Academic stress rarely arrives as a clear statement. It arrives as slang that sounds like a joke — and because it sounds like a joke, it's easy to laugh along and miss it. The words below are worth listening to properly.
What you'll actually hear
- that test was actually cooked
- if i fail this i'm gonna crash out
- need to lock in this week
- lowkey haven't started it
Watch
TVO Today · 28:04
Lisa Damour: What's Going On With Teenagers? | The Agenda
A clinical psychologist on what adolescent distress normally looks like, and the point at which it stops being normal. The clearest half hour we found on that distinction.
What it tends to mean
Patterns worth noticing — not diagnoses.
"Crash out" is a genuine warning
It describes losing composure completely — rage, tears, a message they'll regret. A teenager saying they're 'about to crash out' is telling you they're past their limit, in the only register available to them.
Humour as a first draft
Joking about failing is often how a subject gets tested for safety before it's raised properly. Responding to the topic rather than the joke tends to open the door.
"Lock in" is the good sign
Worth knowing the positives too. 'I need to lock in' is a teenager announcing they're about to work — one of the few pieces of slang that's straightforwardly encouraging.
Three things you could say tonight
Low-stakes openers. The goal is a conversation, not an interrogation.
- What's the workload actually like this term?
- Which subject is the one that's stressing you out?
- Is there anything I'm doing that's making it worse?
The vocabulary
Where to get proper help
We decode the language. These organisations do the support — all independent, none affiliated with us.
- YoungMinds (UK)Parents' helpline and mental health guides
- Anna Freud CentreEvidence-based mental health advice for families
- The Mix (UK)Support and a helpline for under-25s
- NSPCCAdvice for parents and carers
- ChildlineFree, confidential support for under-19s
- YoungMinds (UK)Parents' helpline and mental health guides
Know the words, or test yourself.
Every term on this page has its own entry — or find out how much you're missing in two minutes.